In a society that values consumption, materialism, and pleasure as appropriate substitutes for genuine happiness, the new economy of recession has laid bare the pitfalls of unsustainable lifestyle choices. Lately, it seems that five basic guidelines would save a lot of us a lot of trouble.
1) Live within your means. If you can't afford it, don't buy it. Don't confuse your purchasing power with your self-esteem, and don't confuse Shiny New Things for genuine pleasure.
2) Keep your promises. If you are supposed to be somewhere at a certain time, show up. If you promise to be there for someone, show up. If you are married, keep your vows, unless your partner is abusive.
3) Don't tell lies. It's way too stressful to keep secrets, especially petty ones. Sleep with a clear conscience.
4) Be grateful for one thing every day, and express gratitude to at least one person every day. It makes you attractive, and makes it easier to smile!
5) Do at least one healthy thing a day for yourself. Exercise. Meditate. Eat well. No therapist can coach you 24/7; our job is to make sure you don't need us (at least it should be).
If more of us could do these five things, we'd be spared a lot of trouble, and our society would probably be much happier.
Thank you for reading!
Showing posts with label therapy. Show all posts
Showing posts with label therapy. Show all posts
Wednesday, February 17, 2010
Wednesday, May 13, 2009
Climbing Mountains
During a period of transition in my life, I had the good fortune the meet a gifted therapist. In trying to determine which road I should take, she asked me a powerful questions which I have also come to adopt as a therapist many years later.
She asked me if I was looking back on my life in my old age, which of the choices in front of me would give me the greatest satisfaction.
The hardest times, like living through the death of a loved one, losing the illusion of stability we all take for granted, or transitioning to a new part of our lives, invite us to ask the same question-- which choice would give us the greatest satisfaction, the most meaning?
The process is similar to setting anchors for ropes when climbing a mountain or a tall rock. If you get too high up, your rope will catch your fall if it has been secured to an anchor. In life, setting these anchors of meaning can serve the same purpose. They can help you decide which steps can guide the path to your goal and remind you if your deeds are helping you along the way.
The difficult question in grief, in the ambiguity of losing a stable identity, is often "who do I become now?"
The mindful path can help you find a meaningful answer.
She asked me if I was looking back on my life in my old age, which of the choices in front of me would give me the greatest satisfaction.
The hardest times, like living through the death of a loved one, losing the illusion of stability we all take for granted, or transitioning to a new part of our lives, invite us to ask the same question-- which choice would give us the greatest satisfaction, the most meaning?
The process is similar to setting anchors for ropes when climbing a mountain or a tall rock. If you get too high up, your rope will catch your fall if it has been secured to an anchor. In life, setting these anchors of meaning can serve the same purpose. They can help you decide which steps can guide the path to your goal and remind you if your deeds are helping you along the way.
The difficult question in grief, in the ambiguity of losing a stable identity, is often "who do I become now?"
The mindful path can help you find a meaningful answer.
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